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第5季第8集 一条毛巾 S05E08 Towelie 双语合成 刘磊
* 欢迎来到南方公园 * ♪ I'm going down to South Park ♪
* 享受一段美好时光 * ♪ Gonna have myself a time ♪
* 友善的面容随处可见 * ♪ Friendly faces everywhere ♪
* 淳朴的居民乐天知命 * ♪ Humble folks without temptation ♪
* 我要到南方公园转一转 * ♪ I'm going down to South Park ♪
* 把烦恼丢天边 * ♪ Gonna leave my woes behind ♪
* 阡陌交通 秩序井然 * ♪ Ample parking day or night ♪
* 邻里和睦 相亲相爱 * ♪ People spouting "howdy neighbor" ♪
* 径直奔向南方公园 * ♪ Headin' on up to South Park ♪
* 快活似神仙 * ♪ Gonna see if I can't unwind ♪
* 大波妹子把手牵 咪咪大到我疯癫 * ♪ Mrph rmhmhm rm! Mrph rmhmhm rm! ♪
* 快来南方公园 * ♪ Come on down to South Park ♪
* 和好友谈笑风生 * ♪ And meet some friends of mine ♪
耶 把你灭了 Ah, killed you.
你被我爆头了 I blew your head off.
天啊 Cartman还在厕所吗 Jesus, is Cartman still in the bathroom?
嘿 Cartman 我们都快20级了 Hey, Cartman, we're almost to level 20!
你是在生孩子还是怎样? You giving birth in there or what?
大个便不行吗 Let a man take a crap.
伙计 他在里面折磨我的马桶 Dude, he's in there punishing my toilet.
是啊 可怜的马桶 Yeah, that poor, poor thing.
快点 Cartman 你错过游戏了 Come on, Cartman, you're missing the game!
我快好了 你们这些聪明鬼 I'm almost done, you smart asses.
我只是在擦... 这是什么? I'm just wiping my-- what the hell is that?
伙计们 看看我在 Stan厕所的垃圾桶里 You guys, look what I found in the trash can
发现了什么 in Stan's bathroom.
看上去像是厕纸里 包着血淋淋的棉花 It's like a bloody cotton thing wrapped in toilet paper.
你干嘛从垃圾桶里挖出来? Why did you pull it out of the trash?
我以为这是果酱甜甜圈 Because I thought it was a jelly doughnut,
快看 上面都是血 but look, check it out. It's all bloody.
- 你们还在打游戏吗 Are you boys still playing that video game?
- 是的 妈 Cartman在厕所里 Yeah; hey, Mom, Cartman found a bloody cotton thing
发现了一块血棉花 in the bathroom.
看哪 不过我想这没什么用处 Look. But I don't think it's for using.
我想这只是用来看的 I think it's just for looking through.
- Eric 把它放下 - 为什么? Eric, put that down. - Why?
可是它浑身是血 它可能有生命的 But it's, like, all bloody. It might be alive.
不 那个... 那是我的 No, that-- that came from me.
把它放回垃圾桶去就是了 Just put it away.
你就把它放在垃圾桶里了? You just left it in the trash can?
"你不该这么做的 他还是个孩子 "You shouldn't have done that. He's just a boy.
可怜的孩子" Poor little feller."
这是什么 妈妈 What is it, Mom?
是啊 这是什么 Marsh太太? Yeah, what is it, Mrs. Marsh?
孩子们 这是... 女性专用的 好吗 Boys, that's a... feminine thing, alright?
这是女性的私人用品 It's a personal woman thing.
这样吧 I tell you what.
要是你们不再刨根问底这件事 If you'll just drop the whole thing right now,
我就给你们买 你们一直想要的 I'll buy you that new video game console
那台游戏机 you've been wanting.
2001版PS2吗? The 2001 Okama Gamesphere?
- 没错 - 酷 Sure. - Cool!
哇 真是垃圾桶里淘出了宝 伙计们 Wow, this is like finding trash can gold, you guys.
就在那儿 PS2 There it is, the Okama Gamesphere.
它有128千兆赫的存取存储器 Dude, it's got 128 gigahertz D-RAM.
这是什么? What's that?
不知道 但是很销魂 I don't know, but it kicks ass.
兄弟 你真是南方公园最走运的小孩 Wow, dude, you're the luckiest kid in South Park.
嘿 这是我们所有人的 Hey, this is all of ours.
是我在垃圾桶里 I'm the one who found Stan's aborted brother
找到了Stan被打掉的弟弟 in the trash can
然后威胁他妈妈买PS2的 and blackmailed his mom into getting the Gamesphere.
好吧 好吧 你们得看看 Alright, alright, but you guys got to see
这个周末能不能住在我家 if you can sleep over for the rest of the weekend.
现在是周六下午2点半 也就是说... It's Saturday at 2:30. That means we have...
在周一上学前 我们还有39个小时玩PS2 39 hours to play Gamesphere until school on Monday.
- 哇哈! - 太棒了! Whoo-hoo! - Awesome!
Oh, crap. What? - 哦 该死 - 什么?
我明天要和家人去湖边玩 I'm supposed to go to the lake with my family tomorrow
在白痴的太阳下面游泳玩耍 and swim and play in the stupid sun.
伙计 我们有PS2啊 Dude, we got Gamesphere.
我知道 我知道 I know, I know.
这样吧 我今晚还是住你家 Well, look, I'll stay over anyway
这样就能玩...18个小时 so I can play for... 18 hours.
然后我再去湖边 And then I'll go to the lake.
别忘了带毛巾哦 Don't forget to bring a towel.
什么? What?
当你从水里出来以后 When you get out of the water,
必须马上擦干身体 you need to dry off right away
以防感冒 to avoid catching a cold.
所以"海宝"说 That's why Towelie says:
"别忘了带毛巾哦" "Don't forget to bring a towel."
- 好的 - 谢谢你 海宝 Okay. - Thanks, Towelie.
你们想磕点药吗 You want to get high?
不想 No.
总之 这样我就有足够的时间 Anyway, that will give me plenty of time
玩游戏了 playing video games.
Kyle 我想你低估PS2了 Kyle, I think you underestimate Okama Gamesphere.
给你们 孩子们 Here you go, boys.
Aah!!
好了 快打开 Okay, turn it on.
PS2 Okama Gamesphere!
Whoa!
嗜血 Thirst for Blood!
耶 "嗜血" 快来吧 Oh yeah, Thirst for Blood; bring it.
哦 太酷了 Oh, this is so cool.
来吧 来吧 Bring it, bring it!
晚安 孩子们 别太晚睡 Good night, boys. Don't stay up too late.
晚安 妈妈 谢谢你买了PS2 Good night, Mom. Thanks for Gamesphere.
是的 不过你还是不应该那么做的 Yeah, but you still shouldn't have done that;
他只是个孩子 He's just a boy.
- 什么? - 没什么 走吧 Randy What? Nothing, come on, Randy.
妈妈 我不能去湖边了 Yeah, Mom, I can't go to the lake.
不 Stan有情绪上的问题 No, Stan's having emotional problems,
我们需要帮他度过难关 and we need to help see him through it.
他有... 什么来着? He's got--what is it?
约会强暴精神病 Date Rape Psychosis.
"约会强暴"什么的 Date Rape Something.
好的 我会的 Yeah, okay, I will.
谢了 妈妈 Okay, thanks, Mom.
我不用出去了! I don't have to go outside!
太棒了!Awesome!
她说没关系 She said it's fine,
不过我今晚还是要去棒球训练 but that I still have to go to baseball practice tonight.
对哦 我们今天还有棒球训练 该死的 Oh, yeah, we've got baseball practice today. God dammit!
我们不应该有这么多义务 We shouldn't have this many responsibilities.
我们还是孩子 We're children.
没关系 我们还能玩六个多小时 It's alright; we can still play for six more hours,
然后再去打棒球 and then we'll go play baseball.
别忘了带毛巾哦 Don't forget to bring a towel.
啊 不 Ah, no.
当你运动时 When you're playing sports,
会汗流浃背 the sweat can get in your face.
所以海宝友情提醒 That's why Towelie says,
"在包里要多备一条毛巾" "Always keep an extra towel in your duffel bag."
好的 我们会的 Okay, we will.
好耶 Alright!
要磕点药吗 You want to get high?
不 我们不想嗑药 No, we don't want to get high.
好吧 Okay.
你们确定? You sure?
是的 滚开 你这条蠢毛巾 Yes, go away, you stupid towel!
伙计 你看见没? Oh, dude, did you see that?
我把你的头切下来吃掉了 I cut off your face and ate it.
太酷了 That's so cool!
孩子们 够了 你们该走了 Okay, boys, that's it. You have to go now.
不 不 没事 妈妈 No, no, it's okay, mom.
我们不能去棒球训练了We can't go to baseball practice
因为Kyle得了癌 because Kyle has cancer.
不 Stanley 现在是星期一早上了 No, Stanley, it's Monday morning.
你们得去学校 You have to go to school.
已经星期一了? It's Monday?
- 呃 我病了 - 我也是 Oh, um, I'm sick. Me too.
不 你们没有病 快去学校 No, you're not sick. Now get to school,
所有人 all of you.
- 可是妈妈... - 快去 But, Mom! - Go!
Ahh!
真不敢相信我们还要上学 I can't believe we have to go to school.
是啊 现实生活又无趣又愚蠢 Yeah, real life is so boring and stupid.
我们要想办法 We just have to try and make the day
让白天快点过去 go as fast as possible
这样就能回去玩PS2了 so we can get back to Gamesphere.
-孩子们 你们好吗 -很好 Hello, boys, how are you? - Fine.
孩子们 这说出来有点奇怪 Say, boys, this may sound a little odd,
不过你们有没有 看到一条会说话的毛巾? but have you seen a talking towel around anywhere?
什么 你是说海宝吗 What, you mean Towelie?
Echo 我是Garret Echo, this is Garret.
我发现了代号五 在科罗拉多公园县 I've got a Code Five at... Park County, Colorado.
代号五 科罗拉多公园县 Repeat: Code Five, Park County, Colorado!
搞什么 伙计? What, dude?
今天会很漫长的 This is gonna be one long-ass day.
今天真是在学校过的最长的一天 That was the longest day of school ever.
快点 我们今天肯定能打到29级 Come on, hurry. I bet we can get to level 29.
它去哪儿了? Where is it?
它...它原来是在这里的啊 It--it was right here.
它到哪里去了?! Where the hell is it?
拜托 这一点都不好笑 Come on, man, this isn't funny,
我不能没有它啊 I need my fix.
喂 Hello?
要是你还想再见到PS2 If you ever want to see your Okama Gamesphere again,
就把那条毛巾带过来 you'll bring us the towel.
什么 你是谁? What? Who is this?
找到毛巾就是了 Just get the towel
在镇外的加油站和我们碰头 and meet us at the gas station outside of town.
不然的话... Or else.
PS2 Okama Gamesphere!
别伤害它! Don't hurt it!
怎么回事? What?
他们拿走了 They've taken it.
他们把PS2拿走了 They've taken our Okama Gamesphere.
不... 不! NO... No!
什么叫他们拿走了? What do you mean they've taken it?
哦 这不可能 Oh, this isn't happening.
这不可能! This isn't happening!
海宝! Towelie!
嘿 毛巾! Hey, towel!
他到底在哪儿? Where the hell is he?
他会在哪儿? Where the hell could he be?
不知道 电话里的那个人 I don't know; the guy on the phone
以为我们和海宝在一起 thought we had Towelie,
所以我们必须找到他 so now we got to find him.
这个世界怎么了 What has this world come to,
人们可以随随便便把你的PS2带走 where people can just take your Okama Gamesphere?
嘿 也许我们该学毛巾叫 Hey, maybe we better do a towel call.
Herrrre-gttt! Herrrre-gttt!
这就是毛巾叫了? That's a towel call?
没希望了 我们永远找不到他的 This is hopeless. We're never gonna find him.
嘿 等等 Hey, wait a minute.
海宝每次出现给我们毛巾的建议 Towelie always showed up to give us towel advice
都是在我们说到水的时候 when we said something about water.
没错 Hey, yeah.
伙计们 咱们去游泳池吧 Well, guys, let's go to the swimming pool.
咱们去洗澡吧 Ah, let's go take a shower.
去滑水吧 Let's go water-skiing!
别忘了带毛巾哦 Don't forget to bring a towel.
他来了 There he is!
别忘了带毛巾哦 免得湿身 Be sure to bring a towel so you don't get all wet.
快来 伙计 Come on, dude.
要去哪儿? Where we going?
快走 天快黑了 Just come on. It's getting dark.
我们要去嗑药吗 Are we gonna get high?
你确定他们说的是这儿吗 Are you sure this is where they said to be?
他们说在镇外的加油站 They said the gas station outside of town.
我要磕点药 Well, I'm gonna get a little high.
站住 Hold it!
是谁? Who's that?
离开那条毛巾 Step away from the towel!
你在这儿啊 小毛巾 There you are, towel.
我们到处在找你 We've been looking all over for you.
如果你要去住宾馆 If you ever go to a hotel,
一定要自带毛巾 be sure to bring your own towel.
外面对你来说不安全 小毛巾 It isn't safe for you out here, towel.
外面有很多人想伤害你 There are people out here who mean to harm you.
不好意思 能把PS2还给我们吗 Excuse me, can we have our Okama Gamesphere back?
我们只想玩游戏 We just want to play video games.
你们的什么? Your what?
瞧 伙计 我们现在24级 Ah, look dude, we're on level 24,
快要进入疯狂山洞了 about to cross into the Caverns of Madness.
我不知道你们在说什么 I don't know what you're talking about.
你打电话的时候说 如果我们把毛巾带来 You called us and said if we brought the towel,
就会把游戏机还给我们 you'd give us our video game back.
天啊 这是个陷阱! Oh, my God, it's a trap.
掩护 掩护! Cover! Cover!
该死的 这是怎么回事? Oh, God damn it, what now?
快跑 毛巾! Run, towel!
过来 他们肯定把游戏机Come on, they got to have our video game
藏在附近 around here somewhere.
毛巾在哪儿? 肯定走不远 Where's the towel? It can't be far.
Alvarez 你和Mitchell去搜左边 Alvarez, you and Mitchell sweep left.
快点 你们必须把毛巾带回Tyna公司 Hurry, you must get the towel back to Tynacorp.
我们的PS2在哪儿? Where is our Okama Gamesphere?
带毛巾回家 Get the towel home.
他们会解释的 They'll explain everything.
求你了 快点 Please, hurry.
该死的 Ah, God damn it!
你知道他在说什么吗 海宝? Do you know where he's talking about, Towelie?
啊? 知道啊 在基地那边 What? Oh, yeah, back at the base.
离这儿很远 It's a long ways away.
好吧 我们可以用这辆卡车 Alright, we're gonna have to use this truck.
过来 伙计们 Come on, guys.
怎么样? -他们不见了 长官 Well? - They've gone, sir.
他们好像凭空消失了 It's like they vanished out of thin air.
该死的 Damn it!
我就知道那些小孩在保护毛巾 I knew those boys were protecting that towel.
他们一定有说不清道不明的关系 They must have some unexplainable bond with it.
也许他们和毛巾有心灵感应 长官 Perhaps they're telepathically linked to the towel, sir,
像"ET"一样 like E.T.
他们可能已经远走高飞 又躲起来了 They could already be anywhere, hiding out again.
不需要再装好人了 No, the time for being nice is over.
我们要启动... B计划 We must instigate... Plan "B."
你是说... You mean...
没错 Yes.
销毁方圆一英里内的所有毛巾 Destroy all towels within a thousand-mile radius.
嘿 你喜欢海宝吗? Hey, do you love Towelie?
很好 因为海宝的周边产品上市了 Good, because Towelie merchandise is now available.
抢先展现对海宝的热情吧 Be the first to show your enthusiasm for Towelie
这里有全新的"我爱海宝"T恤 with the all-new "I Love Towelie" t-shirt.
如果你不喜欢海宝 And if you don't like Towelie,
你可以买"我恨海宝"T恤 you can buy the "I Hate Towelie" t-shirt.
100%棉哦亲 It's 100% cotton!
即将上市的海报毛巾 And available soon, the Towelie towel.
它可以说你喜欢的口头禅 It comes with all your favorite catch phrases:
想嗑药吗? "You want to get high?"
马上打电话订购 "我爱海宝" So call now and order your "I Love Towelie"
或"我恨海宝"T恤吧 or "I Hate Towelie" t-shirt.
可以刷美国运通和发现卡 American Express or Discover Card.
数量有限 Supplies are limited,
欲购从速 so order one of these great t-shirts right away.
快到了吗? Are we getting close?
我想是的 I think so.
加点速 Kenny A little more gas, Kenny.
你有多久没回来了? How long has it been since you've been back there?
过去几周我都一个人在外闯荡 I've been wandering around on my own for the past few weeks,
向大家宣传毛巾安全知识 you know, helping people out with towel safety
和如何正确使用毛巾 这很重要 and proper towel use; it's important.
- 不 这不重要 - 重要的 No, it isn't. - Is.
等等 在这儿转弯 就在这条土路上 Wait, turn down here. It's down this dirt road.
刹车 Kenny 刹车 Brake, Kenny, brake.
也许是在那条土路上 Maybe it's down that dirt road.
兄弟 你不记得在哪儿了吗? Dude, don't you remember where it is?
不记得了 看上去都一样 I can't remember. It all looks the same.
等等 让我先磕点药 然后我就记得起来在哪儿了 Hold on, let me get high. Then I'll remember where it is.
好了 在哪儿? Alright, so where is it?
什么在哪儿? Where's what?
Ah!!
你出生的基地 我们的PS2所在的地方 The base where you're from and our Okama Gamesphere is.
好了 够了 Alright, that does it.
急刹车 Kenny Brake angrily, Kenny.
听着 海宝 我们受够你了 Listen, Towelie, we've just about had it with you.
冷静点嘛 Calm down.
够了 你不能再嗑药了 That's it; you're not getting high again
直到我们找回PS2 until we have our Okama Gamesphere back.
那是我最后一点大麻了 混蛋 That's my last "J", asshole!
我不管 你最好想起来基地在哪儿 I don't care; you better remember where your base is.
天啊 为什么今天所有人都欺负我 Oh, man, why is everyone riding me today?
该死的 God damn it.
Kevin Kevin?
记得用铝箔纸把土豆沙拉包好 Don't forget to wrap the potato salad in aluminum foil.
Kevin 是你吗 Kevin, is that you?
Harris 攻破 撞击 然后完成任务 Harris, breach, bang and clear!
有人吗 Hello?
我的天哪 不要! Oh, my God! Oh, no!
好了 任务完成 任务完成 Alright, it's clear. It's clear!
Aah!!
撤 撤! Go! Go!
抓住它! 搞什... Get it! What the...
把它扔掉! Throw it down!
好吧 随便你们想干嘛 Oh, alright, have your way with me, if you must.
继续啊 满足你们变态的欲望吧 Go on, fulfill your sick pleasures.
好了 我们撤 Alright, let's go.
你们去哪? Where you going?
你就是从这来的? This is where you came from?
是吧 可能是 Yeah, I think so.
- 老兄 - 怎么了? Oh, man. - What?
我现在太嗨了 I am so high right now.
根本就云里雾里了 I have no idea what's going on.
欢迎回家 智能RG-400毛巾 Welcome home, smart towel RG-400.
嗨 我们的PS2在你们这吗 Uh, hi, is this where our Okama Gamesphere is?
我们正在浪费 We're missing out
宝贵的游戏时间 on some quality video game time right now.
谢谢你们带它回家 男孩们 Thank you for bringing him to us, boys.
它不是条普通的毛巾 You see, this is not an ordinary towel.
他是智能RG-400毛巾 He is the RG-400 smart towel,
毛巾布里有电脑芯片 designed with a computer chip inside the terry cloth.
我们没兴趣 We don't care.
看 在Tyna公司 You see, here at Tynacorp,
我们的目标 是研制出一条完美的毛巾 our goal was to make the perfect towel,
它能感知使用者皮肤的干湿程度 a towel that would sense how wet or dry the user's skin was
并随之调整自己的蓬松度 and fluff itself accordingly.
老兄 我们对这事没兴趣 Dude, we don't care.
海宝是我们最伟大的发明 Towelie was our greatest success,
它棋艺高于常人 smart enough to beat the average human at chess
吸水力极强 即使在最干燥的情况下依然能吸水 and absorbent enough to soak up even the toughest spills.
但有一天 海宝嗑药了 But then one day, Towelie got high
然后就开始到处乱跑了 and just sort of wandered off.
我们...不...想听 We...Don't..Care.
我们只想知道谁拿了我们的PS2 All we want to know is who has our Okama Gamesphere?
是 你们的游戏机 Ah, yes, your video game.
我想这一切可能都是个陷阱 I'm afraid that what we all experienced was a trap.
他们给你打电话说 要你们把海宝带上 They called you and said to bring the towel,
但他们又给我们打电话说 他们要把海宝带回来 and then they called us and said they were bringing Towelie back.
他们是想一箭双雕 Their plan was to wipe us all out with one fell swoop.
谁是"他们"? -军方啊 Who's "they"? Why, the military.
在海宝磕了药到处乱跑后 You see, after Towelie got high and wandered off from here,
军方抓住了他 the military got ahold of him.
他们想把海宝 变成大规模杀伤性武器 They wanted to turn Towelie into a weapon of mass destruction.
没兴趣 没兴趣 没兴趣 Don't care, don't care, don't care.
这几个月他们一直 把海宝囚禁在基地里 Towelie was at their base for months
试图复制他的基因 as they tried to copy his T.N.A.
但是 有一天 海宝又嗑药了 But then, one day, Towelie got high
然后又开始乱跑了 and just sort of wandered off...again.
我靠 停下来好吗! God damn it. Can we please!
让我们回去玩游戏吧 好吗?! Just get back to playing our video game, please!
恐怕不行 I'm afraid not,
因为你们的PS2在他们的基地里 because your Okama Gamesphere is at their base.
那请告诉我们基地在哪 好吗 Can you tell us where that is, please?
你们是想潜进他们基地去? You mean to go right into their base?
可以 Of course.
通行密码应该还在海宝的内存条上 The entry code should still be in Towelie's memory banks.
你们可以带着他偷偷溜进去 然后找回他的基因 You could sneak him in there and recover his T.N.A.
好计划啊! Great plan!
长官 军士长和助手向您报告 长官! Sir, Sergeant Masters and Buller reporting, Sir!
好的 Ah, yes.
说说 海军陆战队队长 你们是否已完成了任务? Tell me, marine, did you accomplish your primary goal?
长官 是的 长官! Sir, yes, sir!
所有的毛巾都已被毁 All towels have been destroyed.
智能毛巾也肯定被除掉了 The smart towel is no doubt eliminated.
你们百分百确定吗 Ah, and you're quite sure of this?
是的 长官 方圆百里内的毛巾都已被消灭了 Yes, sir, there isn't a towel left within 100 miles.
那么 你们能不能解释下 Hmm, so perhaps, then, you can explain to me
为什么我们刚刚发现 海宝已返回了Tyna公司?! why we just got footage of the towel returning to Tynacorp?
我们...它毕竟是智能毛巾啊 长官 We--he must've outsmarted us, sir.
捉迷藏游戏正式结束 Well, I'm through playing hide-and-seek.
我们别无选择了 We've got no other choice.
准备好炸毁整个科罗拉多州 Prepare to blow up all of Colorado.
很快我们就要到达基地上空了 In a moment, we will be over the base.
这是进去的唯一办法 This is the only way in.
如果你们通过陆地潜入 Any attempts on ground
你们就会立马被警卫发现的 would be easily spotted by guard posts.
好的 Okay.
我也不想把你送回去 海宝 I hate to send you back in there, Towelie,
但只有你的内存条上才有通行密码 but only you have their security system in your memory banks.
没关系 带上条毛巾总是有好处的 That's alright; it's always good to bring a towel.
孩子们 祝你们好运 Good luck, boys.
整个世界的命运就靠你们了 The fate of the world is depending on you.
我们这么做不是为了这个世界 We're not doing it for the world.
而是为了我们的游戏机 We're doing it for our video game.
-天哪 你是聋的吗 -好了 男孩们 God, are you deaf? Alright, boys,
当你们跳下去后 打开机关 when you drop from the plane, cover and roll.
- 懂了没? - 懂了 Got it? Yeah.
走 走 走 走! Go, go, go, go!
- 老兄 我知道了 - 什么 Dude, I figured it out. - What?
如果我们能在三十分钟内进去 然后拿到游戏机 If we can go in and get the Gamesphere in 30 minutes,
我们就可以在12点前 we could still be back at your house
回你家继续玩游戏了 playing video games by midnight.
也就是说 So that'd be what, like,
在去上学之前还可以玩8个小时 eight hours we could play before school?
七个半小时 Seven and a half.
快啊 你这个傻逼降落伞 Hurry up, stupid parachute.
好了 我想我们到了 Alright, I think we go over there.
让我想想... Let's see...
不对 No.
拜托 海宝 那个老头说 Come on, Towelie, the guy said
你内存条上有通关密码 you had the security system in your memory banks.
那是很久前的事了 Hey, it's been a long time.
你记忆力低下 You just have no long-term memory
是因为你总在嗑药 because you get high all the time.
别总是教训我 胖子! Don't preach to me, fatso!
我可以想怎么教训就怎么教训你 I can preach to you all I want
-因为你太傻叉了 -你才傻叉呢! 'cause you're stupid! - You're stupid!
是呀 但你是条毛巾 Yeah, but you're a towel.
你才是毛巾呢! You're a towel!
让我来一口 Just let me get high.
如果我来上了一口 我就能记得了 I know I can remember if I get high.
靠 Oh, God damn it.
好吧 好吧 给你打火机 Alright, fine, here's your stupid lighter.
等下 Hold on.
再等下 Wait a second.
-就是这个 -就是这个? That's it. - That's it?
这是打击乐小镇的旋律 Yeah, that's the melody to Funkytown.
你会带我去打击乐小镇吗 ♪ Won't you take me down to Funkytown ♪
不 海宝 通关密码! No, Towelie, the entry code!
什么密码? For what?
我靠 God damn it,
我想我们得翻过这栅栏了 I guess we're gonna have to climb the stupid fence.
到这看看 Let's look in here.
杀了我吧... Kill me...
杀了我吧 Kill me.
我的天啊 不是吧! Oh my God, no!
看看是谁来了 Well, well, well, look what the cat dragged in.
这些都是什么? What are these things?
是用你的基因做出来的复制品 Genetic copies we tried to make with your T.N.A.
但并不太成功 They didn't work too well, I'm afraid.
杀了我吧 Kill me.
是你拿了我们的PS2吗 Do you have our Okama Gamesphere?
孩子们 你们做得不错 把海宝成功的带过来了 You did very well to get the towel this far, boys.
我很好奇 在Tyna公司 他们都说什么了? I wonder, what did they tell you at Tynacorp?
强势而邪恶的政府想把海宝 That the big, bad government wanted to genetically engineer
基因改造成武器? Towelie as a weapon?
现在让我来告诉你们真相 Now let me tell you the real story.
天哪 我们没兴趣 没兴趣 Oh God, don't care, don't care.
是的 我们是在尝试 Yes, we've been trying to make
做自己的海宝基因复制品 our own genetic copies of the towel
但我们是被逼的 but only because we had to.
当我们开始监视Tyna公司时 You see, when we started spying on Tynacorp,
我们发现了一个极其恐怖的阴谋 we discovered a certain terrifying secret.
快 问他是什么恐怖的阴谋! Go on, ask him what terrifying secret!
什么恐怖阴谋? What terrifying secret?
Tyna公司之所以制造这些毛巾 That Tynacorp was making these towels
是为了统治整个世界 in order to take over the world.
我们就不能再玩PS2了 对吧 We're never gonna play Okama Gamesphere again, are we?
你们难道不知道 这些基因强化的 Don't you see what genetically enhanced
智能毛巾能做什么吗 smart towels like these are capable of?
你洗完澡然后用它擦干身体 You get out of the shower and dry yourself off.
但即使你擦干了 这毛巾会让你身体更干燥 But even after you're dry, the towel makes you more dry.
然后它不断的吸收你的水分 It keeps getting you dryer and dryer.
你能想象吗 Can you imagine it,
如果你身体非常干 非常干的话 你是什么感觉? what it would feel like to be way, way too dry?
我来告诉你们些事 或许是些你们不想知道的 I'll tell you something. You don't want to know.
而我也不知道 And I don't know.
但我们也没兴趣 And we don't care.
你们被Tyna公司耍了 孩子们 You've been double-crossed by Tynacorp, kids.
他们故意把你们送进来 然后窃取我们的信息 They set this all up to get you in here and take us down.
所以 这么说吧 So let me get this straight.
我们的PS2还在Tyna公司里? Our Okama Gamesphere is back at Tynacorp?
是的 它一直在那 Oh, yes, it has been all along.
我们能杀死海宝了吗 长官? Could I kill the towel now, sir?
你们继续吧 Go ahead.
不行 等等 No, wait.
或许现在 我们可以用他们的毛巾来对付他们 Perhaps now we can use their own towel against them.
如果这些孩子 还得返回Tyna公司的话 If these boys must return to Tynacorp,
我们也可以跟着他们 去偷袭Tyna公司 then we will launch a sneak attack on Tynacorp as well.
你们带着海宝回Tyna公司核心去 You boys can take the towel to Tynacorp's central core
把这个加密的磁盘 装到他们系统里去 and upload this encryption disk into their system,
就可以一次性的解决他们了 bringing them down once and for all.
但我们对这事没兴趣 But we don't care.
这都在搞什么鬼? What the hell is this?
海宝应该是去那 The towel was supposed to go in there
然后启动它的自毁程序 and then run its own self-destruct sequence.
海宝已经有了自己的意志了 The towel has a will of its own,
它在学着...同情他人 it's learning... compassion.
我们不可能一边对付整个军方 We don't have the manpower to hold off the entire military
然后还一边阻止 这些天真的孩子们靠近核心的 and stop those wonder boys from getting to the core.
那我们别无选择了 Then we have no choice.
我们得提前试用新一代的毛巾 We'll have to test the new prototype a little early.
别忘了带上条毛巾 Don't forget to bring a towel.
好了 孩子们 把海宝带进去 Alright, boys, take the towel back in there
然后说你们完成了任务 and say your mission was accomplished.
然后把这个加密的磁盘 装进他们的电脑 Then upload this encryption disk into their computers.
我们只是想进去拿回我们的游戏机 We're just going in to get our video game back.
如果情况不妙 If anything goes wrong,
就用这个最新研发的光子步枪来应对 use this newly-developed photon rifle.
光子步枪 随便了 Photon rifle. Whatever.
有人没? Hello?
有人吗 Hello, anybody here?
欢迎光临此次派对 孩子们 Welcome to the party, boys.
Ahh!
老兄! Oh, boy! - Aahhh!
想跟我斗 是吗 孩子们? So you thought you could outsmart us, did you, kids?
冲 冲 冲 冲! Yah, move, move, move, move!
别动 混蛋们 Don't make a move, you bastards.
孩子 把海宝带过来 他们不会伤害小孩的 Bring the towel here, boys. They can't shoot children.
别听他们的 他们一直在撒谎 Don't listen to them. They lied to you before.
是啊 孩子们 服从你们的政府 Oh yes, boys, obey your government.
或许是时候让这些孩子们知道 Or perhaps it's time these boys knew
事情的真相了 what was really going on.
天哪 看! Oh my God, look!
我们的游戏机!Our Gamesphere!
PS2! Okama Gamesphere!
真好 我们的记录还留着 Oh, sweet, it still saved our place.
看见没 孩子们 恐怕你们被骗了 You see, boys, I'm afraid you were double-crossed.
如果他们是军方 If they were the military,
他们为什么不一开始就动手? why wouldn't they just attack us to begin with?
因为他们根本不是军方 Because they're not the military.
好吧 或许我们撒谎了 Alright, maybe we lied to you,
但那也是为了保护你们的小命 but it was to protect your own skin.
我们是伪装成军方的反抗组织 We're a resistance group pretending to be the military
目的是为了打倒Tyna公司 to bring Tynacorp down.
哇 你们看 到降落伞这一级了 Whoa, check it out, you guys, parachute level.
真好 Sweet.
或许我该让这些孩子们看看 Then perhaps we should show these kids
Tyna公司实际上 是由些什么人组成的 who Tynacorp really is made up of.
说啊 告诉他们为什么 你们要研制毛巾...你个外星人! Go on, tell them why you've been making towels...Zeitar!
这有金币 快抢金币 Kenny Oh, there's gold. Get the gold, Kenny.
我们的星球正在毁灭 Our planet was dying.
所以我们只能另觅一个新星球 We had no choice but to find a new one.
制造智能毛巾就是为了监视人类 Manufacturing smart towels was our way to spy on humans
看看他们是怎样生活的 and see how they lived.
孩子们 现在你们知道 这恐怖的真相了吧 And now you know the horrible truth, boys.
不管真相是什么 你们这个外星阴谋组织该完蛋了 Truth or no, your alien-murdering group is over.
你能找到它吗 Can you turn it up?
男孩们 快进去核心装置里 Boys, try to reach the core override.
没办法了 我们只能把他们都消除掉 We've got no choice but to try to take them all out.
我想我可以在这搞定 孩子们 I think I can get it from here, boys.
你们在干嘛? 你们会害死我们的 What are you doing? You'll kill us all.
抱歉啊 外星人们 你们妈妈难道没教过你们吗 Sorry, Zeitar, didn't your mama ever tell you?
别惹地球人 Don't mess with Earthlings.
哇! Whoa!
坚持住 Hang on. Kenny!
Kenny!
Ahh!
我的天哪 我们的游戏机 Oh, my God! Our Gamesphere.
你们得让我再靠近点 You've got to move me closer.
快点 Kyle 这地方快爆了 Hurry up, Kyle this place is coming apart.
你在干嘛? What are you doing?
离我远点 你个邪恶的毛巾 Get away from me, you evil towel.
海宝 听我说 Towelie, listen to me.
放手吧 让他们掉下去 Let them go. Drop them.
不可能 他们是我的朋友 No way. They're my friends.
他们不是你的朋友 They aren't your friends.
人类已经毁坏了他们的星球破 Humans have ruined the planet,
坏了他们的环境 killed off their own environment.
他们的时代要结束了 Their time is over.
现在是我们毛巾的时代了 It is the towels' turn now.
差点就拿到了 I've almost got it.
你会松手的 海宝 You're going to let them go, Towelie,
因为我知道你的弱点 because I know your weakness.
这 你可以拿到的 快来 海宝 Here, you can reach it. Come on, Towelie.
你多久没好好抽上一口了 How long has it be since you've had a nice burn, huh?
20还是30秒? 20, 30 seconds?
疯了 Oh, crap.
在救他们和来上一口之间 You're going to have to choose
你会选择哪一个? between their lives and getting high.
你个混蛋 You asshole.
海宝 千万别松手 你个变态毛巾! Towelie, don't let go of us, you God damn towel!
Kyle就快拿到了 Kyle's almost there.
快 海宝 快下决定吧 Come, Towelie, make your decision.
我选择... I choose...
我选择...全都要! I choose... Both!
我拿到了! I got it!
Ahh!
快来 同志们 我们来继续玩吧 Come on, guys, let's go play video games.
好呀 万岁! Alright! - Hooray!
老兄 我们到50级了 Oh, dude, we finished level 50.
爽啊! Awesome!
老兄 我不知道怎么回事 Oh, man, I have no idea what's going on.
快看 Check it out.
我们就要进入秘密地下基地了 Now we're going into the secret underground base.
好了 大伙们 集中注意力 Alright guys, focus.
好像这一级是水下的 Looks like this is gonna be an underwater level.
别忘了带上条毛巾 Don't forget to bring a towel.
你总是这么扫兴 海宝 You're the worst character ever, Towelie.
我知道 I know.