现在请看《南方公园》作者的炉边畅谈 And now, a fireside chat with the creators of South Park.
有请马特·斯通和特雷·帕克 Matt Stone and Trey Parker.
大家好 我是特雷·帕克 Hi. I'm Trey Parker.
我是马特·斯通 And I'm Matt Stone.
这是我们的小魔抓 This is old Scratch.
伙计 快跟大家打个招呼 Say hi, old fella.
我们创作了这部叫做《南方公园》的剧 We do a show called South Park.
马特和特雷 给大家讲讲你们的故事 Matt and Trey, tell us a little about yourselves.
我和马修相识于 Well, I...I met Matthew at the University of Colorado
科罗拉多大学电影系 when I was going to film school.
准确的说 是在上电影制作课时认识的 I actually met him in beginning filmmaking class.
我认识了他 也找到了一个 I met him and found someone who could make me laugh,
无论我多沮丧 都能逗我发笑的人 even when I felt like crying.
伙计们 你们的偶像都是谁呢 Guys, who would you say are your role models?
我觉得我最崇拜的偶像就是马特 I'd have to say my biggest role model is Matt.
我最崇拜的是西奥多·罗斯福 I'd have to say mine is Theodore Roosevelt,
西奥多·罗斯福: 美国第26届总统 并著有多部经典作品
尤其喜欢他在《狂野骑士》中 for his work with the Rough Riders
那段美西战争的描写 in the Spanish-American War
马特和特雷 给大家介绍下这集的故事 Matt and Trey, tell us about this episode.
这集名叫《卡特曼的肛门探针》 It's called "Cartman Gets an Anal Probe."
是我们最爱的一集 It's our favorite episode.
这集中 凯尔的弟弟艾克被外星人拐走了 In it Kyle's brother Ike is abducted by aliens,
而卡特曼的屁股里则被安了些神奇玩意 and Cartman has strange things implanted in his ass.
我想这集会得到 I think the reason this episode is,
小魔抓的喜爱 well, old Scratch's favorite anyway,
是因为这是唯一一集 is because it's the only episode
由我们自己独立拍摄完成的 that Matt and I animated completely by ourselves.
这是在我们获得预订之前 You see this was the pilot episode,
制作出的一集样品 done before we had a series,
所以我们得事事亲为 so Matt and I had to do the whole thing ourselves.
有那么几个月 For several months,
我们呆在阴暗冰冷的小黑屋里 we were locked into a cold, dark, little room,
工作了很长一段时间 for long periods of time.
那个"暴踢娃子"的游戏好像很好玩 You know that "Kick The Baby" game looks fun.
你们玩过真人版的吗 Have you guys have ever played it personally?
首先我们都没有小孩 Well, neither of us have children.
是的 我们的家人就是彼此 That's right. The only family we have is each other
以及小魔抓 and old Scratch.
我们都没成婚 We're not married yet.
甚至没有约过会 We can't even get dates.
但实际上 就算有了孩子 But the truth is, until we have children,
我们也不知道会不会暴踢他们 we're not gonna know whether we'll kick them.
从对外星人劫持的描写来看 You guys seem to write alien-encounter material
你们对此好像很有研究啊 with a certain knowledge.
你们有谁真的被劫持过吗 Have either of you actually ever been abducted?
特雷 没关系的 Trey, it's okay.
告诉大家吧 Go ahead and tell them.
我在南方公园附近长大 I grew up very near the South Park,
我很小的时候确实被劫持过 so I was abducted as a small child.
那段经历至今记忆犹新 I remember the experience.
简直不堪回首 I remember how horrible it was.
这段记忆太丰富了 I remember too much.
总之 赶紧坐好 来欣赏吧 So sit back, relax and enjoy
《卡特曼的肛门探针》 "Cartman Gets an Anal Probe."
《南方公园》第01季第01集 South Park Season 01 Episode 01
"卡特曼的肛门探针" "Cartman Gets an Anal Probe"
I'm going down to south park gonna have myself a time
翻译制作 YYeTs人人影视字幕组
Friendly faces everywhere humble folks without temptation
翻译 小池 泡泡
Going down to south park gonna leave my woes behind
校对 苏小黛
Ample parking day or night people shouting howdy neighbor
后期 鱼骨头
Heading on out to south park gonna see if I can't unwind
总监 Tina WiLL
I like girls with big vaginas I like girls with big fat titties
蓝光终极校订 Tearemix
Come on down to south park and meet some friends of mine
靠 Ah, Damn it!
我弟弟又想跟着我去学校 My little brother's trying to follow me to school again.
艾克 你不能跟我去学校 Ike, you can't come to school with me.
滚回家去 你个小按摩棒 Go home, you little Dildo.
老兄 不许叫我弟弟按摩棒 Dude, don't call my brother a Dildo.
-啥叫按摩棒 -不知道 - What's a Dildo? - I don't know.
反正卡特曼也不知道 Anyway, Cartman doesn't know either.
我知道那是啥 I know what it means!
好啊 那你说是啥 Well, what?
我不告诉你 I'm not telling you.
按摩棒是啥 肯尼 What's a Dildo, Kenny?
是吧 就像凯尔的弟弟一样 Yeah, that's what Kyle's little brother is, all right.
老兄 下手够狠啊 Dude, that kicks ass.
试试这招 准备好没 艾克 Yeah, check this one out. Ready, Ike?
暴踢娃子 Kick the baby.
不许暴踢娃子 Don't kick the baby.
暴踢娃子 Kick the baby.
卡特曼 看来你昨晚没睡好啊 Oh, Cartmen, Looks like you didn't get much sleep last night.
因为我昨晚做了怪梦 That's 'cause I had these bogus nightmares.
是吗 梦到啥了 Really? What about?
我梦见在一个漆黑的夜晚 我独自躺在床上 Well, I dreamt that I was lying in my bed, in the dark...
突然间 屋内闪过一道蓝光 ...when all of a sudden, this bright blue light filled the room.
然后我的房门被慢慢打开 And slowly my bedroom door began to open.
之后我记得的就是... The next thing I remember...
我被拖过走廊 ...I was being dragged through a hallway.
然后被放到一张桌上 Then I was on a table,
那些可拍的外星人想要在我身上做实验 and these scary aliens wanted to operate on me.
它们有着大大的脑袋黑黑的眼睛 And they had big heads and big black eyes.
老兄 那是天外来客 Dude, visitors!
-绝对是 -什么 - Totally. - What?
那不是梦 卡特曼 That wasn't dream, Cartment,
你真的碰到了外星人 those were visitors.
不 绝对是个梦 我老妈说的 No, it was just a dream. My mom said so.
真的有天外来客哦 Visitors are real.
是的 听说它们劫持人类还解剖奶牛 Yeah. They abduct people and mutilate cows.
闭嘴 Shut up, you guys.
你们就是想吓我 You're trying to make me scared,
没门儿 and it's not working.
-孩子们早上好 -早上好 大厨 - Hello, children. - Hey, Chef.
大厨 今天中午吃什么 What's for lunch today? Chef.
今天吃炖牛肉拌黄油面条 Well, today is salisbury steak with buttered noodles.
配菜有炖绿豆或者蔬菜拼盘 And a choice of green bean casserole or vegetable medley.
赞 Kick ass.
话说你们昨晚 Say, did any of you children see
有人看见宇宙飞船了吗 the alien spaceship last night?
有 死胖子看见了 Yeah, fat boy saw it.
不 那只是个梦 No. That was just a dream.
而且我也不胖 这叫魁梧 And I'm not fat, I'm big-boned!
你梦到的是不是有大头黑眼的 Was it the ones with the big long heads and black eyes?
它们把他带上了飞船 They took him on their ship.
那它们有没有给你安装肛门探针 Oh, Did they give you an anal probe?
肛门探针是啥 What's that anal probe?
就是用一个金属环套在你菊花上 That's when they put a big metal hoop up your butt.
他们给你安了吗 卡特曼 Wow, they gave you an anal probe, Cartman?
不 我是说 它们干嘛要这么做 No! I mean, why would they do that?
老兄 肯定安了 对吧 Dude, they did, huh?
外星人往你屁眼里塞了东西 Aliens stuck stuff up your ass!
-没有 -肛门探针 - No. - Anal probe.
闭嘴 小按摩棒 Shut up, Dildo!
我要赶去餐厅了 Well, I gotta get to the cafeteria.
你们几个好好看着这个小胖墩 You children watch that fat boy, now.
他可能已经被外星人控制了 He could be under alien control.
[外星人信徒]
卡特曼 就跟你说是真的吧 We told you they were real, Cartman.
你屁屁这件事 我们也很难过 Sorry to hear about your ass.
你大爷的 它们没动过我屁股 Goddamn it, they didn't do anything to my ass!
那只是个梦 It was just a dream.
那你走路咋这么畸形 卡特曼 Why you walking so funny? Cartmen.
闭嘴 Shut up!
不行艾克 回家去 No, Ike, go home.
就这样 再玩一次 This is it. This one's for the game.
-玩球吗 -暴踢娃子 - Play ball? - Kick the baby.
早上好 卡女士 Good morning, Mrs. Crabtree.
赶紧坐好 我们要迟到了 Sit down, we're running late!
坐好 闭嘴
糟了 他还在那 Damn it! He's still there.
别管他了 Don't worry about him.
不行老兄 要是他出了什么事 No, dude, if something happens to him,
我爸妈可要骂死我 my parents is gonna blame me.
后排的坐好了 Sit down back there!
好吧 管他呢 死肥婆 Yeah, whatever, you fat bitch.
你说什么 What did you say?!
我说我很痒 I said, I have a bad itch.
额滴神啊 Oh, my God!
-外星人 -不要 - Visitors! - Oh, no!
-艾克 -停车 - Ike! - Stop the bus!
卡女士 您必须停车 Mrs. Crabtree, you have to stop this bus!
-你想被点名批评吗 -不想 - Do you want an office referral? - No.
-那就滚回去坐好 -可我 - Then sit down! - But l...
卡特曼 你梦到的是那些外星人吗 Cartman, are those the same visitors you saw?
你们别扯了 吓不倒我的 Get off you guys, it's not working.
我们得去救他 We have to do something.
现在我们无能为力 Well, we can't do anything right now.
死肥婆不会让我们下车的 That fat bitch won't let us.
你说什么 What did you say?!
我说兔子吃青草 I said that rabbits eat lettuce.
是的 它们确实吃青草 Well, yes, they certainly do.
我该怎么办 What am I gonna do?
我弟弟被外星人抓走了 My little brother has been abducted by aliens.
你放屁了 You farted.
谁把甜点烤糊了 Somebody's baking brownies.
这是这个月死的第三只牛 That's the third cow this month.
按这个速度 这些牛撑不过冬天了 At this rate, all my cattle will die before the winter's through.
这件事非常可疑 This is definitely unusual.
奶牛不一直都是反刍动物吗 Cows turn themselves inside out all the time.
有人声称在附近看见过UFO People been saying they've been seeing UFOs around.
不明飞行物 UFOs?
还看见黑衣人和中情局的直升机和卡车 And Black Army CIA helicopters and trucks.
这是我听过的最扯蛋的事 That is the silliest thing that I've ever heard.
-刚才那是什么 -鸽子而已 - What was that? - That...that was a pigeon.
我该怎么办 巴布莱迪 What am I supposed to do, Barbrady?
难道就站在这里 Just stand here
眼看着牛儿们一个又一个被残害吗 and watch my cattle get mutilated one by one?
我的牛 Hey, my cattle!
牛场
你都看见了吧 You see?
肯定发生了什么蹊跷的事情 There is something funny going on.
没什么蹊跷的事情 There's nothing funny going on.
我会把这些牛弄回来的 I'll get those cows back.
孩子们 我们亲爱的帽子先生 And now children, our friend Mr. Hat is going to
将给我们讲些克里斯托弗·哥伦布的事迹 tell us about Christopher Columbus.
是的 加里森老师 That's right, Mr. Garrison.
克里斯托弗·哥伦布发现了美洲大陆 Christopher Columbus discovered America
他是印第安人的好朋友 and was the Indians' best friend.
他帮助印第安人 He helped them win their war
战胜了弗雷德里克·道格拉斯 against Frederick Douglass...
并解放了拿破仑黑暗统治下的希伯来人 ...and freed the Hebrews from Napoleon
他还发现了法国 and discovered France.
我不能这么傻坐着 I can't just sit here,
我得去救我那傻弟弟 I have to help my stupid brother.
如果我不把他带回家 If I come home without him,
我爸肯定会吼我 my dad will start yelling:
凯尔 你弟弟去哪了 "Where's your brother, Kyle?
凯尔 你也不去找找他吗 You weren't looking out for him, Kyle?"
好吧好吧 我们就翘课去找他吧 Okay, okay, let's ditch school and go find him.
你知道他还无法独立 凯尔 You know we can't think on his own. Kyle.
刷牙去 凯尔 Brush and floss, Kyle.
-都几点了 凯尔 -够了 - Where has that finger been, Kyle?" - Dude!
孩子们 有事吗 Is there a problem? Boys.
是 加里森老师 我得走了 Yes, Mr. Garrison. I have to go now.
是吗 凯尔 Oh, really, Kyle?
这次又是什么理由 What is it this time?
前列腺又长了个瘤吗 Another prostate tumor?
不 我弟弟被外星人抓走了 No, my little brother's been abducted by aliens.
真的 不信去问卡特曼 It's true. Ask Cartman.
他们给他安了肛门探针 They gave him an anal probe.
呵呵 真搞笑 呵呵 Hehe, hehe, that's a little joke, hehe,he...
加里森老师 我真的得走了 Mr. Garrison, seriously, I have to go.
您能允许我离开吗 Can I please be excused from class?
我不知道 凯尔 你问过帽子先生了吗 I don't know, Kyle. Did you ask Mr. Hat?
我不想问帽子先生 我在问你 I don't wanna ask Mr. Hat. I'm asking you!
我想你得先问问帽子先生 I think you should ask Mr. Hat.
帽子先生 您能允许我离开吗 Mr. Hat, may I please be excused from class?
凯尔 不行 Well, Kyle, no!
你听到了吗 滚一边去吧 You hear me? You go to hell!
滚一边死去吧 You go to hell and you die!
看来你得回座位去了 Hmm, guess you'll have to take your seat, Kyle.
-日你妹 -帽子先生吼你了 - Damn it! - Ha-ha, Mr. Hat yelled at you.
-我的屁股 -怎么了 卡特曼 - Ahh! My ass! - Damn, Cartman!
-我屁股 -老兄 -他居然在喷火 - Ahh! My ass! - Dude, he's farting fire!
肯定是外星人的肛门探针 It's the alien anal probe.
它在从卡特曼的菊花里喷火 It's shooting fire from Cartman's rectum!
不是 那只是个梦 No, that was just a dream.
埃里克 要不你先坐到角落去 Eric, do you need to sit in the corner
等你燃气喷完再回来 until your flaming gas is under control?
不了 加里森老师 我还好 No, Mr. Garrison, I'm fine.
下一班开往丹佛的火车于12:30发车 乘客请在此候车
牛是不能上火车的 Hey, you cows can't get on this train.
这趟车只搭人 This is a people train.
牛跟载人火车可不搭界 对吧 You cows have no business on a people train, all right?
你们只是牛 You're cows.
别想用那招催眠我 明白吗 No, no, no, don't try any of that cow hypnosis on me, all right?
对我是没用的 Because it's not gonna work.
奶牛们 站那不许动 Hold it right there, cows.
都给我回来 Come back here!
我肯定是我饿了 I sure I am hungry.
你怎么能边喷火边吃东西呢 How can you eat when you fart fire?
闭嘴 伙计 真没见过世面 Shut up, dude, you're being totally immature.
看 那不是温迪·泰斯博格吗 Look, there's Wendy Testaburger.
哪儿 Where?
斯坦想亲温迪·泰斯博格 Stan wants to kiss Wendy Testaburger
闭嘴 死胖子 我才不喜欢她呢 Shut up, fat ass, I don't like her.
我才不胖呢 I'm not fat.
你明明就喜欢她 And you obviously like her
因为每次她跟你讲话 你都要吐 because you throw up everytime she talks to you.
我才没有 I do not.
[学校饭菜就是好啊就是好]
-同学们好 -好啊 温蒂 - Hi, guys. - Hi, Wendy.
斯坦 这个是送你的 Here, Stan, this is for you.
再见 温蒂 Bye, Wendy.
老兄 上面写的什么 Dude, what does the note say?
哇靠 Holy crap!
她约我放学后去史塔克池塘 She wants to meet me at Stark's Pond after school.
那你有机会亲她了 Whoa, maybe you can kiss her.
或者跟她舌吻 Or slip her the tongue.
什么 你咋知道她养了只猫 What? How do you know she has a cat?
拜托 伙计们 Come on, you guys.
我们得想个法子离开学校 We need figure out how to ditch school
这样才能去救我弟弟 so we can get my little brother back.
-孩子们好啊 -大厨好 - Hello, children. - Hey, chef.
你们还好吗 How are you doing?
-很糟 -为什么糟呢 - Bad. - Why bad?
大厨 你有没有真的经历过什么事 Chef, have you ever had something happen to you,
可没人相信你 but nobody believed you?
孩子们啊孩子们 Oh, children, children,
这是我们在漫漫人生中 that's a problem we've all had to face
都会时不时遇到的问题 at some time or another.
我来给你们唱首歌吧 Here, let me sing you a little song.
帮你们放松放松 It might clear things up.
*美女 我要和你亲热* * I'm gonna make love to ya woman *
*把你放在火炉旁* * gonna lay ya down by the fire *
*腐摸你柔美身体* * And caress your womanly body *
*让你湿透且呻吟* * make ya moan and perspire *
-*要让你欲罢不能* -大厨别唱了 - * Gonna get those juices flowin' * - Hah, Chef!
-大厨 -*我们要亲热亲热* - Chef! - * we're makin' love gravy, love gravy, *
*亲热亲热亲热* * lovelovelovelovelove GRAVIH *
大厨别唱了 Chef!
-感觉好点了吗 -没有 - Do you feel better? - No.
拜托 孩子们 什么事这么糟糕 Oh, come on, children, what can be so bad?
今天提供的可是炖牛肉 It's Salisbury-steak day.
外星人抓走了凯尔的弟弟 Visitors took Kyle's baby brother.
什么 What?!
那你们还他妈的留在学校 What the hell are you thinking doing in school
吃啥炖牛肉啊 eating Salisbury steak?
奶奶的 赶紧去找他啊 Go find him! Damn it!
可加里森老师不让我们走 Mr. Garrison won't let us go.
他认为是我们编的 He thinks we're making it up.
你们就是在编 You are making it up.
-怎么了 -太帅了 - What? - That was cool!
那是一种共生异形装置 It's some kind of symbiotic metamorphosis device.
这表示外星人也许想和咱们交流 This could mean the visitors want to communicate to us.
我懂了 你也跟他们一起笑话我是吧 Oh, I see. You're joining in on the joke, eh?
孩子们 我说真的 这是件大事 It's no joke, children. This is big.
求你了 大厨 如果我不离开学校 Please, chef, If I don't get out of school and
救回我弟 我爸妈会灭了我的 get Ike back from Aliens, my parents is gonna disown me.
稍安勿躁 Ah, hold on, hold on now.
我得帮帮这些孩子 You got to help the children.
你们干嘛千方百计地恐吓我 You guys are going a long way to try and scare me.
我要吃我的索尔斯伯利牛肉饼 I want my Salisbury steak.
[发生火灾 请拉响警报]
现在是消防演习 大家快出去 Fire drill, fire drill! Everybody out!
快 孩子们 机会来了 Okay, children, this is your chance.
你太牛了 谢了 大厨 Killer. Thanks, Chef.
哇哦 第一次和外星访客有了联系 Man, Oh, man, first contact with the alien visitors.
我得好好准备一下 I've gotta get myself ready.
我们逃出了学校 We got out of school.
今天不用再学习 No more school today.
我们逃出了学校 We got out of school.
等等 我的屁股 You guys, my ass, seriously!
卡特曼 现在不用再放火屁了 Okay, Cartman, you can stop farting fire now.
王八蛋 你以为我不想啊 I would if I could, you son of a bitch!
咱们要怎么救回我弟 Okay, so how do we get my brother back?
别提你弟了行不 Would you stop going on about your little brother?
根本没有什么外星人 I know it was just a dream!
我屁眼也就没有肛门探针 I know I didn't have an anal probe!
我更没有被外星人控制 And I know that I am not under alien control!
*我爱唱歌* * I love to singa *
*歌唱月亮 六月和春天* * About the moona and June-a and the springa *
*我爱唱歌* * I love to singa *
*歌唱蓝天和一杯鸳鸯茶* * About a sky of blue-a or a tea for two *
啥情况 What the hell was that?
他被外星人控制了 He is under alien control.
他屁眼里的东西是个信号接收器 That thing in his butt's linked up to the visitors.
靠 草泥马 Ah! Son of a bitch!
你们闭嘴 我没被外星人控制 You guys, shut up. I'm not under alien control.
外星人 你们给我听着 Hey, if you visitors can hear me,
还我弟弟 该死的 bring back my brother, goddamn it!
哎呀疼 你个死屁蛋 That hurts, you butt-licker!
凯尔 看 是外星人 Kyle, look, it's them.
还我弟弟 Give me back my brother!
偶滴神 他们杀了肯尼 Oh, my God, they killed Kenny!
混蛋 You bastards!
给我回来 回来 Come back here! Come back!
靠 就差一点了 Damn it, we were so close!
看 肯尼没死 Hey, look. I think Kenny's okay.
可怜的肯尼 Wow, poor Kenny.
-你现在肯相信了吧 -坚决不信 - Now do you believe us? - No.
卡特曼 外星人杀死了肯尼 Cartman, they killed Kenny.
他没死 He's not dead.
伙计 他死了 看见没 Dude, Kenny is dead. See?
你们给我闭嘴 Shut up, you guys.
卡特曼 他真的死了 He's dead, Cartman.
见鬼 总之我屁眼没探针 Damn it, I didn't have an anal probe!
你们继续脑残 我回家偷菜去了 Screw you guys, I'm going home.
滚吧滚吧 你个死胖子 Go on and go home, you fat chicken!
按摩棒 Dildo!
我现在只有你了 斯坦 You're all I have left, Stan.
抱歉 温蒂约了我 Sorry, dude, I gotta meet Wendy.
你怎能一走了之 我弟孤零零地待在那 You can't. Poor Ike must be so scared,
肯定怕极了 你得帮我 up there all alone. You gotta help me, dude.
就像大厨说的 Like Chef says,
恋爱要趁热打铁 "I'm getting a piece of loving while the getting's hot."
反骨仔 Rats!
-埃里克回来啦 -妈 - Hello, Eric. - Hi, Mom.
-今天过得怎样 -老子现在很生气 - How are you doing? - Well, I'm pissed off.
来 我给你做了糖粉甜甜圈薄饼 Here, I made you powdered-doughnut pancake surprise.
我才不稀罕 I don't want powdered-doughnut pancake surprise.
学校的同学都叫我胖子 All the kids in school call me fat.
你不胖 你那叫魁梧 You're not fat, you're big-boned.
我也是这么说的 That's what I said.
-吃一小口吧 -不要 - You can have an eensy-weensy bit, can't you? - No.
就一小口 Just a weensy-eensy woo-woo?
不吃 妈 别理我 No. Leave me alone, Mom.
那你要吃巧克力鸡肉馅饼吗 How about a nice chocolate chicken potpie then?
这...这个还成 Well, that does sound pretty good.
-妈 -怎么了 儿子 - Mom? - Yes, hon?
如果有人来找我 就说我不在 If anybody calls or visits, I'm not here, okay?
好的 要来点芝士脆吗 Sure. hon. You want some Cheesy Poofs too?
当然 我爱芝士脆 Yeah, I want Cheesy Poofs.
斯坦 看样子她不会来了 Well, looks like she isn't ganna show up, Stan.
咱们去找外星人吧 Let's go look for the visitors now.
但她说会在这等我 But her note said she'd be here.
斯坦 你好 Hi, Stan.
温蒂 你不能和斯坦说话 You can't talk to Stan, Wendy.
你一说他就吐 He throws up when you do.
为啥啊 斯坦 But why, Stan?
你们快点行不 Look, could you guys just get down to business
我们还要去找回我弟 so we can go find my little brother?
快点生火做爱 Just make sweet love by the fire.
你弟弟怎么了 What happened to your little brother?
目击飞碟的报道越来越多 As it's reported the UFO sightings increase...
南方公园周围的地面上 ...more mysterious crop-circle patterns
出现了大量的神秘麦田圈的图案 are appearing in fields all around south park.
从高空看下来 这些麦田圈 These crop circles, when viewed from above,
构成了一个奇怪的图案 form strange patterns.
看上去有点像汤姆·塞立克[美国演员] Hey, that kind of looks like Tom Selleck.
会不会是外星人 Could it be that aliens
想联系咱地球上的人类呢 are trying to make contact with us here on earth?
不行 这是我的肉馅饼 No, Kitty, this is my potpie.
不能给你 臭猫 No, Kitty, you bad kitty.
臭猫 这是我的 No, Kitty, this is my potpie!
妈 臭猫很陈冠希啊 Mom! Kitty's being a dildo!
那妈妈 Well then I know a certain
今晚和猫猫睡 kitty-kitty who's sleeping with Mommy tonight.
啥 What?!
我今晚不把他平安带回家的话 Now I have to go home without him,
我爸妈会灭了我的 and my parents will have me killed.
-你咋不去找肥卡 -找他干嘛 - Well, why don't you get the fat kid? - Why?
如果外星人真在他屁股装了东西 Well, if the fat kid has something implanted in his ass...
那他就是外星人的访美计划的一部分 ...maybe he's a part of the visitors' plan.
你该用肥卡做饵 引蛇出洞 Use the fat kid as bait to bring them back.
对啊 温蒂 Hey, you're right, Wendy.
走吧 斯坦 咱们去找卡特曼 Come on, Stan. We have to get Cartman.
走吧 斯坦 Come on, Stan.
等等 啥时候做爱呢 Hey, wait. When do I get to make sweet love?
不行 臭猫 你半点都别想要 No, Kitty, you can't have any!
臭猫 这是我的馅饼 No, Kitty, this is my potpie! Bad kitty!
不好意思了 猫猫 Excuse me, Kitty.
埃里克 看看谁来了 Eric, look who's here.
妈 你出卖我 Good work, Mom!
走吧 埃里克 我们去车站玩 Come on, Eric, let's play at the bus stop.
不行 我妈说 I can't, Mom says...
没事 去吧 埃里克 That's okay. Eric.
你应该多和朋友一起玩 I think you need to spend time with your friends.
妈 可我不想跟他们玩 But, mom, I don't want to spend time with my friend...
埃里克 不准耍大牌 Don't be difficult, Eric!
快去和朋友一起玩雪吧 Now, you go and play in the fun snow.
靠 真他妈杯具 Goddamn it!
我得回家了 You guys, I have to get home.
别那么胆小 卡特曼 Don't be such a fraidy-cat, Cartman.
有这绳子绑着 你就不会被飞碟带走 This rope will make sure they can't take you onboard again.
-靠 烂透了 -他们咋还不来 - Oh, man, This sucks! - How come they aren't coming?
咱们得想办法通知他们 I think we have to signal them somehow.
看啊 他真像鲁道夫[圣诞老人的麋鹿] Hey, he's like Rudolph.
对啊 卡特曼 你尽情地放火屁吧 Yeah, all you have to do is fart, Cartman,
外星人一定会来的 and the visitors are sure to come.
是吗 可我今晚放不出来了 Really? I don't think I have to fart anymore tonight.
-不行 快点放 -快放 - Sure, you do. - Come on, fart!
我不想放 I don't wanna!
他不可能一直憋着不放的 He can't hold it in forever.
-快给我放 -靠 我受够了 - Fart, damn you! - Okay, that does it!
为啥今天发生的所有事 Why is it that everything today has involved things...
都跟俺屁股有关呢 ...either going in or coming out of my ass?
我受够了 这实在太幼稚了 I'm sick of it! It's completely immature!
他的屁股有状况了 It's happening again.
不看不知道 一看吓一跳 Whoa, look at that.
卡特曼 现在你相信了吗 Now do you believe us, Cartman?
你们吓不倒我的 You guys can't scare me.
这一切都是你们编造的谎言 I know you're making it all up.
卡特曼 从你的屁股伸出来 Cartman, there's an 80-foot satellite dish
一个八十英尺的碟形卫星天线 sticking out of your ass!
是啊是啊 你们爱咋说咋说 Sure, you guys, whatever.
[欢迎外星访客]
外星人将要和人类做第一次接触了 Oh, boy, the aliens are going to make first contact.
快来吧 我们准备好接受外星智慧了 Hey! Down here! We are ready for your wisdom.
还有二十分钟《桑福德和儿子》就开播了 And you only got 20 minutes before Sanford and Son is on!
我现在很生气 后果很严重 You guys, I am seriously getting pissed off right now.
我知道世上根本没有外星人 I know there's no such thing as aliens!
真是见鬼 Oh, goddamn it!
那是什么 What the...?
我敢说 这小镇要发生可怕的事了 I tell you, there's crazy stuff going on in this town.
加里森老师 说得好 You can say that again, Mr. Garrison.
快给我下来 该死的外星人 Come down here, you stinking aliens!
继续啊 向他们要回你弟弟 Go on, ask them for your little brother back.
外星访客 你们今早带走了我弟弟 V-Visitors, this morning you took my brother Ike.
他只是个带雀斑的像足球一样的小孩 He's a little freckled kid and looks like a football.
起初我挺高兴你们把他带走了 At first I was happy you took him,
但经过今天我发现 but I've learned something today:
其实拥有一个弟弟是件挺特别的事 that having a little brother is pretty special thing.
访客先生 疯狂世界里我只是沧海一粟 Heck, Mr.Visters, I'm just a kid all alone in this crazy world.
但如果你能行行好 But if you can find it in your hearts whatever you have,
把弟弟还给我 to give my brother back to me,
我的生活将会更美满 ...it sure would make my life brighter again.
哥们儿 你说得太好了 That was beautiful, dude.
-有用吗 -没有 他们要走了 - Did it work? - No. They're leaving.
你们这群瘦得不像样的人渣 Hey, you scrawny-assed shit!
你们他妈的怎么回事 What the fuck is wrong with you?
你们这群没心没肺的杂种 You must be some kind of fucker
竟然无视一个哭泣的小孩 to ignore a crying child!
兄弟 来狠的啊 Wow, dude.
你知道你他妈像啥吗 You know what you fucking like?
你们就是一陈冠希 You like to fuck!
傻逼 fuck!
脑残 fuck!
烂人 fuck!
温蒂 谁是陈冠希 Hey, Wendy, what's a fucker?
艾克 跳下来 快 Ike, jump down! Now!
看在上帝的份上 跳吧 For the love of God, Ike, jump!
以后不准伤害我 Don't hurt me.
地球的牛 你们好 我们是为和平而来的
真的吗
艾克 来吧 我保证以后会对你好 Come on, Ike, I promise I'll be nice to you from now on.
不准再玩爆踢娃子了 Don't kick the baby.
我们对地球上所有的生物进行了实验
我们发现
你们是最聪明伶俐的
他们在说啥鬼话 What are they talking about?
那你为什么要解剖我们的同伴
那是加里的错 他是新手
真是抱歉 都是我的错
艾克 Ike,
把这个装置收下
这是送给你们的礼物
艾克 快模仿大卫·卡罗素的演艺生涯 Ike, do your impersonation of David Caruso's career!
大卫·卡罗素：美国男演员 曾由电视圈转战电影界而一度陷入低谷
轮到我了 It's my turn.
牛 再见了 祝你们平安
喂你们 把我弄下来 You guys, get me down from here!
救命啊 救命啊 Help! Help!
你们这群王八蛋 Sons of bitches!
按摩棒 Dildo!
总算完事了 我真高兴 I'm sure glad that's over with.
是啊 真高兴见到你 艾克 Yeah, boy, am I glad to see you, Ike!
飞碟飞走了 Oh, she's fly at the sky.
等等 外星人 你们去哪 Wait! Where are you going, alien visitors?
回来 Come back!
大厨 你给我们准备的惊喜在哪呢 Well, Chef, Where's this amazing thing you were gonna show us?
女士们 在寝室里 Well, It's in the bedroom, ladies.
跟我来 Come on in.
艾克 走吧 我们还赶得及吃晚饭 Come on, Ike, we can make it in time for dinner.
-温蒂 谢谢你来帮忙 -客气啥 - Thanks for helping, Wendy. - Whatever. dude.
-哇 我不再吐了 -太酷了 - Hey, I didn't throw up. - Cool.
抱歉 Sorry.
-看 有炸薯条 -真酷 - Hey, look, a French fry. - Cool.
-那是什么 -我想是芝士脆的残渣 - What's that? - I think It's part of a Cheesy Poof.
-那个呢 -汉堡包 - Hey, what's that? - That's a hamburger.
那是两天前吃的 That's from two days ago!
那这又是什么 Hey, what about that?
我也不知道那是什么鬼东西 I don't know what the hell that is.
天哪 校巴马上就要到了 Gee, The bus will be here in a minute.
但卡特曼还在外星人那 and Cartman still isn't around.
是啊 我们又少了一个朋友 Yeah, we're running out of friends.
我很好奇外星人给牛群的是啥 I wonder what the thing was that the visitors gave the cows?
牛 你们走投无路了 Haha, Cows, I got you cornered.
看你们还能往哪跑 Let's see you get away now.
*我爱唱歌 歌唱月亮六月和春天* * I love to singa!About the moona and June-a and the springa *
*我爱唱歌 歌唱蓝天和一杯鸳鸯茶* * I love to singa.About a sky of blue-a or a tea for two *
卡特曼 你来了 Oh, hey, Cartman.
卡特曼 外星人在上学前及时送你来了 Wow, Cartman, the visitors dropped you off just in time for school.
我昨晚做了一个很疯狂的恶梦 Oh, man, I had a crazy nightmare last night.
真的 梦到啥了 Really? What about?
我独自站在空旷的田地上 Well, I was standing out in a field.
屁股里跑出来一个碟形卫星天线 I had this satellite dish sticking out of my butt...
然后出现了外星人和上百头牛 ...and then there were hundreds of cows and aliens.
然后我被带到船上 Then I went on the ship,
斯克特·拜奥[美国电视演员]传染了我红眼病 and Scott Baio gave me pinkeye.
那不是梦 一切都是真的 That wasn't a dream. That really happened.
哦是吗 那为啥我没得红眼病呢 Ah! Right. Why don't I have pinkeye then?
卡特曼 你确实得了红眼病 Cartman! You do have pinkeye!
靠 草泥马 Ah! Son of a bitch!